random

assalamualaikum,
rasanya ini kali pertama menulis blog sejak bergelar doktor secara rasminya.
rindunya saat bergelar student.
sebenarnya teringat satu kata-kata ustaz waktu sekolah menengah.Ustaz rosdi kalau tak salah.
dulu ustaz pernah cakap,sebab student selalu ponteng jemaah kat surau,ustaz ckp mcm ni"nnti bila dah besar,belum tentu kamu dapat pergi surau"and i think apa yang dia cakap sangat la true.after sekolah menengah still pergi surau untuk jemaah sebab bilik dekat sangar,but semakin nak habis final year,semakin jarang.sibuk itula inilaa.sedangkan ada saja masa.tapi manusia selalu carikan alasan as denial.But now,bila dah kerja lagilaa susah.kalau boleh jemaah dengan housemate adalah satu yang best,tapi itulah,selalu bila dah balik rumah,mesti ada yang dah tidur dan sebagainya.dulu kalau ilmu rohani,pengisian sangat byk,dtg bergolek ke kita,but sekrang,kena pandai ambil peluang.takut nnti tgh sibuk kerja,Allah tarik nyawa tgh jalan,and apa bekalan kita time tu?

marriage

salam,

soalan satu
erk,umur berapa yang sesuai untuk tamatkan zaman bujang?

soalan dua
apa yang kita prepare untuk kahwin?

soalan tiga
kenapa kena kahwin?

soalan empat
kalau parents suruh kahwin,tapi kita taknak,alasan kenapa?

ok,random questions sebenarnya :-)

dulu selalu terfikir,apalah yang seronoknya kalau dapat grad?

and now baru tersedar,susahnyaaaaaaaaaaaaaa nak grad.banyak cabaran and cabaran paling besar is emosi diri sendiri.

and now baru faham,kenapa orang menangis time graduation day.

i want to grad soooooooooooooooooon,and i want they call my name with the Dr in the front this 28th april.optimis optimis optimis,

keep dreaming,

btw,buang perkataan susah dalam kamus,cakap kurang senang sahaja.nanti mak marah :-)

doakan kami ye!

akhirnya....

assalamualaikum,

kira punya kira,countdown day after day,akhirnya tinggal lagi satu hari sahaja sebelum kami semua menduduki final.final yang menentukan penentuan hidup kami terutama in the next 6 months.teruskan sambung belajar ataupun bekerja.Ya Allah,kalau ikutkan sebenarnya dua-dua tak nak.kerja yang surely double up the stress and 6 months belajar yang erk.....

Alhamdulillah,disebalik ups and downs dalam study week ni,im grateful enough to have a very supportive family.Everyday they will call me(either mak,abah or anis),or sometimes tiga-tiga orang akan telefon,selalunya pada masa yang berbeza.Pastinya setiap kali telefon akan tanya"macam mana semangat hari ni?",fav question abah"baca buku tak hari ni".and surely kalau anis dengan mak call,jeritan semangat depa smpi orang luar pun boleh dengar.hahahahaha

Sekarang,kalau baring-baring,kena pejam mata,imagine and bayangkan this 28th april,dean sebut nama kita with the DR in the front,InsyaAllah,akan menjadi kenyataan.Bukan apa,bila kita buat macam tu,rasanya akan build up little confidence and bukan terus dibuai dengan perasaan cuak nak exam tu.

and one more thing yang akan terus push ourselves is our parents la kan their hope etc.Semalam,my parents datang,i dont ask them to do that btw.Abah ada prog hari sabtu,and mak ada farewell ceremony with her boss.Erk,depa tak habaq pun,yang depa ada prog on the next day,kalau tak surely tak bagi datang.nak cerita bertapa mak ngan abah bagi pengorbanan semata-mata nak datang melawat anak,bagi semangat,penat2 bawak kereta.kalau ikutkan abah nak balik je lepas datang semalam,but selepas dipujuk rayu they go back today.bertolak before subuh,and sekarang sudah sampai gerik.insyaAllah sejam lagi sampaila rumah.nak cakapnya,mak ayah hang dah bekorban aina,apa lagi yang hang nak?takkan nak merungut sedih cuak nak exam?nothing gonna change pun,so move on laaaaaaaaaaaa.ok move move move.

okla,cant wait this 28th april,insyaAllah yang terbaik untuk kita.ameen :-)

believe

early this morning,i had a simple but meaningful conversation with one of my colleagues.She told me her story,as usual,end posting surely cakap pasal exam.

and by that time,mcm biasa we will say surely ada hikmah disebalik sesuatu perkara.(bak kata kakpah;untuk menyedapkan hati)

but somehow,it made me ponder,betulke kita betul-betul percaya disebalik suatu perkara,ada hikmah disebaliknya?betul ke kita percaya atau kita saja nak menyedapkan hati?to me,bukan 100% untuk percaya,sometimes tetap ada ragu-ragu.and rasanya bila kita percaya,we will work hard untuk dapatkan apa yang diimpi.so please work hard!

and mungkin itulah hikamh disebalik percaya mengenai perkara tersebut.sebagai mana sultan muhammad fateh percaya Islam pasti akan menawan kota konstantinopel,percaya berdasarkan hadis Rasulullah.

moral:believe in the future la kan :-)

:-)

kalau tak silap,lebih kurang 3 bulan dan 2 minggu,peperiksaan akhir akan memula.Penentuan lulus untuk menjadi seorang doktor atau tidak.Sekejap sahaja.Pejam celik,pejam celik  dah hampir 5 tahun tinggal di Kelantan.Banyak kenangan yang ada dekat sini.baik yang indah mahupun sedih.Banyak yang jatuh,tapi banyak juga yang bangun.Lumrah alam.Kesenangan atau kesusahan sebenarnya suatu ujian.Kenangan study group sama-sama dekat bilik nisa,lepas tu dekat halaman DM3,lepas tu tukar ahli study group,berlatih dekat MDL,skill lab,ward,buat soalan osce,share dengan study group yang lain.banyak lagi la :-)

dan sekarang dah final year,lagi 2 posting insyaAllah,besarnya dugaan dan tanggungjawab,macam tak cukup lagi ilmu untuk jadi doktor.jadi a safe doctor.tapi insyAllah,the best is with us.

semalam tak tahulah mimpi apa,tengok-tengok dapat phone call "ok,turun bawah sekarang",rupa-rupanya parents datang.pelik pula sedangkan baru sahaja pulang last week.Abah cakap"saja,sebab bosan duduk rumah",ok accepted reason juga.tapi macam agak tak logik.

korek punya korek,anis cakap they came to give u some inspirations,some motivations.entahlah nak sedih terharu pun ada,nak gembira pun ada.macam takut pun ada.banyangkan mcm mana parents punya harapan yang tinggi untuk anaknya.regardless who they are actually.all they want is the best for us.semua parents macam tu kan :-)

bila fikir-fikir balik,ya Allah rasa bersalah bila kita terus biarkan diri dibelenggu sifat malas,biasala,semangat belajar ada naik dan turun.tapi kita kena fight untuk terus naik.dan rasa malu bila biarkan diri terus tenggelam dengan sifat malas tak semangat itu.sedangkan ibu bapa kita berdoa siang dan malam untuk kita.

beberapa minggu lepas,ada pelajar yang kantoi sebab ponteng kelas.but soalan yang doktor tanya,apa perasaan mak kamu bila dia tahu kamu ponteng.just put the question dekat kita.tanya hati,jawab sendiri.

Ya Allah,3 bulan lagi.tiupkan lah semangat yang tinggi untuk kami.bantulah kami untuk tolong menolong,jauhkanlah perasaan buruk sangka iri hati dan sebagainya.bantulah kami.ameen

impian kami nak cakap,

"Mak,Abah,we are doctors" in next 3 months.insyaAllah.

hmm

i hate DISTRICT!

we have so many things untuk search

evidence based medicine

investigative assignment

everything is journal,journal and journal

EVIDENCE

but i learned a lot.and to appreciate JOURNAL :-)

clearing destructive thoughts!

One of the biggest secrets to getting what you want is to let go of all negative thoughts. Destructive thoughts are only there to help bring you down and make you feel insecure about the things you can really do. Although there is no real science behind this attitude, studies reveal that optimistic people have healthier lives. It's as if the universe liked what they thought and returned this favor by pushing luck in their direction.

It's normal to doubt certain areas in your life. Things don't always pan out that way you hoped they would, and you're bound to make mistakes along the way. But this doesn't necessarily mean that you always have to think of the worst outcome all the time. To save your pride, you try to prepare yourself for things to turn out sourly. This is probably the biggest blunder you'll ever make. You need to take a dip in the pool of self-assurance and swim in the sea of faith.

To avoid awkward circumstances, you come up with a number of excuses as to why you shouldn't engage in a certain situation. These excuses act like your prison until you hinder yourself from fully experiencing anything that could improve your life. You have to realize that everyone needs to try out new things for them to fully grow. Life doesn't hand you instant happiness in a silver chalice. You have to work at it and push yourself a bit further. You don't necessarily have to take big leaps. In fact, small baby steps will be fine, just as long as you keep moving forward.

Another important thing you must do is to stop thinking about your recent run-in with bad luck. You think that the only way to stop disappointments is to not think about things working out. This hampers your level of excitement, and less excited people are just more likely to perform poorly. Stop subconsciously telling yourself that you can never be happy. This is a classic case of self-fulfilling prophecy. The more you expect things to work against you, the more they will. Why? Because your actions will likely be influenced by your negativity. You don't have to count your eggs before they've hatched, but allow yourself to go through the journey that may one day open the doors for your success. Keep dreaming and hoping, but more than that, never stop trying.

While you work your way up the ladder of success, you are so careful not to step on anyone's toes. While this is a very healthy attitude, you sometimes become too afraid about imposing something on someone else. You become fearful of inconveniencing and offending others that you lock yourself in one place for too long. This might make someone else feel uncomfortable, but that isn't reason enough for you to not go for your desires. Just remember that as long as you are not lying, cheating, breaking the law, or carelessly causing someone pain, you owe it to yourself to live your life to the fullest.

Things just don't happen because they aren't meant to be. You can make fate work for you by believing that you are always given the opportunity to better your life. If you want something badly enough, the rewards of taking the chance outweigh the hindrances that come with it. You just need to keep the ball rolling until you'll see that the world actually works for you. 

source:-http://www.wingsfortheheart.com

escapism!

one,
currently,im not happy with my task,yes,unhappy :-(

two,
im sad,i want to spill,but somehow they are busy,preoccupied with their own stress.where to turn?

three,
which one is better,understand others or you want people to understand you?

four,
people always think they have  a very heavier burden on their shoulder,being narcissistic,people should understand them,without understand ayat 2:286

im sick of these people,im trying to understand them,i have my own stress,sometimes i need to spill but when the time comes,i would lend my ears for them.it make me ponder that they suffer more compared to me.
therefore,Alhamdulillah.i learned from them!

i heard about this quote this morning

"lupakan musibah,tetapi jangan lupa pengajaran darinya"

sweet kan?

btw,dengar la motivasi pagi dekat radio IKIM every monday to friday around 730-800 am.bila rasa pagi tu kurang motivasi,at least bila dapat boost insyaAllah ok sikit.better dari tak semangat seharian kan :-)

random!

dulu-dulu pernah dengar tazkirah yang bila dekat akhirat,Allah akan tanya apa yang kita buat bila muda instead of bila tua.dulu tak pernah fikir kenapa nak tanya soalan macam tu,until one day,bila encountered an osteoarthritic patient.mungkin ada reason sebenar Allah nak tanya,but logically Allah tu Maha Adil,surely Dia akan tanya apa yang kita buat bila muda instead of tua.ye la dah tua,nak jalan pun tak larat,nak solat pun susah.sakit lutut la,kena solat duduk,nak pergi solat dekat surau pun susah,sakit nak jalan jauh.itu tak termasuk lagi urinary incontinence associated with sphincter laxity,tambah bila nak sujud or rukuk time solat.semua tu problem orang tua.So mungkin sebab tu kut.yeah,Allah Maha Adil :-)

ok,btw nak cakap ni,my study group dah start aggressively since last month.so we did some mcq,meq and osce questions selain dari clinical.so sapa2 yang nak buat soalan meq,or osce kami,mintaklaa.soalan tu buat sendiri or some cedok2 dari past year.so mungkin takdela ikut standard exam,buat rasanya tak kisah kan kalau nak refresh otak.so boleh la minta dekat munirah,kakpah or anis duha.depa rajin nak foward2 ni.hehehe

ok,assalamualaikum :-)

rumble

assalamualaikum to all,

i never know what is IMAM MUDA.i heard about it but i have no idea what it is all about.until one day,i was you tubing and key in "imam muda".my window popped out the winner of that programme,Imam Muda Asyraf.he is superb.MasyaAllah,SubhanAllah.

whoever is the imam,the important is the content that u want to deliver.wether it can open our heart or not.(but back to hidayah is milik Allah).tapi kalau the way they deliver the content macam sesetengah khatib or penceramah yang baca teks,mata pun boleh tertutup.public speaking memang penting :-)

and one more,last few months,i was infected by a virus spreading my sibilings.they love to read books and currently minat dalam sejarah tokoh-tokoh islam terutama karya Abdul Latif Talib.paling menarik kisah salahuddin al-ayyubi dan sultan muhammad al fateh.but my parents said,kalau setakat minat membaca tapi tak ambil pengajaran dari kisah tu,takde kesannya.Tokoh-tokoh tu patut dijadikan contoh.dijadikan sumber motivasi,as a reflection in a way to become a good person.paling tersentuh kisah umar abdul aziz,bagaimana dia sangat memberatkan amanah yang diberikan.

kalau nak baca,bacalah kisah sultan muhammad fateh,salahuddin al-ayyubi dan umar abd aziz.boleh rasa nak menangis,sangat bermotivasi dan buatkan kita kagum dan sedar everything is back to Allah :-)

rumble

assalamualaikum

i just having a conversation with my eldest brother.yup,life is getting harder and harder day after day.no doubt on that.i don't know why i feel like my tears are flowing down the cheeks even though i try to remain cheerful  at that time(very fake).but it is not a big problem by the way.

well,since raya is getting nearer although we haven't cross the ramadhan yet, my big brother dah start pening with those raya stuff in a way of duit raya.it just because of the name and the reputation.how he needs to double up his working hour to give us duit raya.huhuhuhu.

nahhhhhhhh,i told him"kalau orang nak bagi kita ambil,kalau taknak bagi takpa,they would understand,if not,buat tak tau saja.the point is back to our niat.kalau just about reputation,baik tak payah,pahala pun tak dapat nanti.baik sedekah duit dekat rumah anak yatim.lagi bagus"

i know,my brother sincerely nak bagi,but somehow he realized that he couldnt afford it.

being the eldest in the family and the eldest grandchildren,well,he has big responsibility la kan; to show a good example to the others.living in KL somehow is troublesome.money is needed here and there,even the toilet.huh!

okla,i dont know why i am ranting about my brother.owh yeah,got my point.it is about bersyukur or to be grateful.

ok,kita kena bersyukur dengan apa yang kita ada.tak kisahlah kalau perkara itu hanya la sekecil mana.bukan wang yang menggunung,rumah yang besar,kereta yang banyak atau jawatan yang tinggi.

well,rezeki itu ada di mana-mana,Allah dah tetapkan setiap orang ada rezekinya masing-masing,it needs our effort to reach it.make sense kan :-)

well,rezeki doesnt mean money by the way.it can be translated as a chance or anything.

early this morning,my junior called me.she asked about her grandparent who had acute urinary rentention,with tense and globular bladder.they failed to insert the catheter so he needs further intervention.somehow it give some reflection to my life.i never realize for being grateful of what i have.i never realize that urinate or BO give some significance to our life.what if you having constipation for a week.or urinary rentention?horrible kan.u cant go here and there,feeling the consistency,u might avoid to drink as it might further distended your bladder.i have seen one case like that during my attachment.very pathetic.

kesian kan.so overall we need to bersyukur for what we have.

till then,

salam

p/s:personal development is important in other to become a  good person :-)

buang bayi

assalamualaikum,

alhamdulilllah,just finished reading the 11th commandment.awesome!u cant resist yourself what happened next after next.from a page flipping to the next page until you realized that clock struck at 12 midnight and u haven't touch your academical books yet.

now i realized that i cannot resist my self to know the ending of the story,dulu ingat malay novel je yang tak boleh stop,perhaps it was because of the story line yang sangat saspen!

by the way,last night,i had a conversation with my friend.we came cross to a topic of buang anak.well,we have seen lots of single parents in the ward,married or not.and surely the bad stigmata will cross the mind.ops!but thinking on the positive site,we should support them actually.maybe they had committed the sin (et:sex before marriage) but they do not throw themselves into the hell again as they will deliver the baby safely(insyaAllah) and at least the foster parents will be taking care of the baby.lagi bagus dari buang bayi yang tak berdosa tu.it opens my eyes laa about that!

and one more,she said that we should be thankful and grateful for our parents.memangla sometimes kita memberontak bila kita kena marah,merajuk or everything.but sometimes we never realize that kita bukanlah tergolong dalam anak yang terbuang itu.kita bersyukur sebab kita takde ibu bapa yang nak buang anaknya.

and she said malaysia mungkin dah maju setapak ke hadapan dalam pembangunan,ekonomi(walaupun harga minyak naik) but sebenarnya kita semakin jauh ke belakang,ibarat di zaman jahiliyah apabila pembuang bayi berleluasa.kalau dulu hanya bayi perempuan yang ditanam hidup-hidup,sekarang dah tak kira jantina lagi.so siapa yang teruk?kita atau orang dulu?

well,i never think about that part pun.thanks for opening my mind!

jeffery archer

for the past two months, i have been reading his collections.highly recommended for those who like thriller novels.those are the novels that i read,and currently im reading the 11th commandment.and ijat baru beli another 2 of his books which is Kane and Abel,and Not a penny less not a penny more.review mcm best sebab kaitan dengan money and politics.hahahaha.unfortunately,since school bukak,i dont have time pun nak read the book.very pathetic!looking for the free time baby!!

your first time

moving here this weekend

by the way,i cant sleep tonight,it is 3 am in the morning.*sigh*

well,my brain keep asking myself,what is your first time in bla bla,one after another,could not stop

so my brain is very active and end up with INSMONIA

therefore,what is your first time in anything that u want to share with us?

hahahaha,my brain tengah recall my first time suture the wound and injecting the LA.and followed with car driving,accident bla bla

no wonder la tak boleh tidur.

too many synapse between the neurons

:-)

rumble

haven't update my blog for quite sometimes

just finished the one month attachment in my hometown

might be busy for the next 3 weeks 

we are moving somewhere

 

update later!

pre-exam symptoms

salam to all,

currently,i'm having severe palpitation the worst ever i think in this year.like last night slept at after 12 or nearly 1,and woke up around 2++ with a fresh mind,gila ke apa?intended to perform solat hajat but afraid to go to the toilet.

and able to sleep back until 530,woke up,perform Fajr prayer.Then alhamdulillah,i was reciting alQuran reading the meaning and i found this ayat: 

"Dan pohonlah pertolongan kepada Allah dengan sabar dan solat"(2:44)

Then,terus hantar message share with my friend :-)

but the nervous still persisted,breakfast with MILO,but vomit.hahaha.memang teruk :-)

and now alhamdulillah getting better.

okla,sebelum pergi exam,jangan lupa solat sunat kawan-kawan.we hope for the best

my paper is at 9 in the morning continue with clinical exam at 130-300pm.

whoever read this post,please doa for me and my friends,pray for the best,weather pass or not,it doesnt matter.as long as it is the best.but no body in this world want to be a failure kan.hehehe

salam!

p/s:i feel lucky to be born as a MUSLIM.at least i know who i want to turn on to seek help :-)

muslim women submit to Allah

Muslim women believe in Allah with a true heart, submit completely to Him, are aware that there is no other deity, that He is the Lord of every being and thing, and that He is All-Powerful. Therefore, she fears and respects only Him and seeks to win only His good pleasure. She worships only Him, accepts only Him as her closest friend, and seeks only His help. She also knows that only He can direct good and bad toward her, and so lives in the full knowledge that she is dependent on Him. She knows that He keeps her alive, provides and cares for her,and protects and guards her. For these reasons, she has no expectations of other people.
 

She believes in Allah without the slightest doubt in her heart for her whole life, never losing heart or belief regardless of the circumstances. She knows how to be grateful and content with her closeness to Him
both when her life is good and when she is undergoing difficulties. She is in a state of constant submission, certain of our Lord's love, compassion, forgiveness, and providence. When she encounters a problem, she knows that Allah has provided a solution in the Qur'an, and that what matters most is her continued
sincere love, submission, and trust in Allah. She is certain of Allah's promise that He creates everything according to His justice and with wisdom and goodness.
 

Even if her problems seem to go on forever, she never surrenders to hopelessness or worries when His help will come. Content with what He has sent her way, she maintains her patience and submission, knowing
that something good will come out of it. She remembers what the Qur'an says about those who abandon their belief in such times. In addition, she recites "My Lord is with me and will guide me" (Surat ash-Shu'ara': 62), just as the Prophets did when faced with hardship.

Throughout her life,her profound faith enables her to see Allah's compassion, closeness, love,
help, and friendship at all times.This superior character becomes even more distinctive when compared
with that of unbelieving women. Some unbelieving women do not show the appropriate degree of submission in their encounters, because they ignore the fact that Allah creates everything and inserts much wisdom
and goodness hidden therein. One of the best-known characteristics of such women is their impatience, lack of determination, panic, and throwing tantrums when experiencing various hardships.

For this reason, and to save themselves the hassle, men often try to keep women away from potentially troublesome situations. Movies and novels are full of such stories. Since they do not place their trust in Allah and do not submit to Him, they cannot find the patience and resolution to endure hard times. In fact, their strength is in direct proportion to the size of the gain they can expect from working through these difficulties.Believing women derive their strength from their belief and their determination to win Allah's good pleasure. Therefore, their resistance can be quite powerful. 

The Qur'an reveals this truth in the following verse: "Allah's guidance, that is true guidance. We are commanded to submit as Muslims to the Lord of all the worlds" (Surat al-An'am: 71).

Allah gives good news to those who submit to Him:
Those who submit themselves completely to Allah and do good have grasped the Firmest Handhold. The end result of all affairs is with Allah. (Surah Luqman: 22)

Not so! All who submit themselves completely to Allah and are gooddoers will find their reward with their Lord. They will feel no fear and will know no sorrow. (Surat al-Baqara: 112)

very lovely!

adapted from Maryam ;the exemplary of Muslim Women
a MUST-book to read :-)

kata nak jadi baik

manusia,
kata nak jadi baik,
kalau hanya kata-kata dan niat
tanpa disertai dengan action apa kes?

kata nak jadi baik,
tapi puasa pun tidak
sembahyang pun tak cukup
apa kes?

kata nak jadi baik,
nampak sahaja baik,
cakap pun kasar,
hati kotor,
apa kes?

baik pada mata manusia sahaja

baik manusia tak sama dengan baik Allah,

sebab zaman sekarang kadang-kadang yang haram kita tengok halal,yang halal kita tengok pelik :-)